Being Single on Valentine’s Day

Hey guys! Happy Valentine’s Day! Do you feel that? That love in the air? No?…..just me finishing my heart shaped Reese’s? Okay moving on… being single on Valentine’s day is always looked at as something to be miserable about. Like all of us single people are going to be crying, while we stuff our face with chocolate. I for one, will be stuffing my face with chocolate but I won’t be crying because I’m single. Having a significant other is great, and I’m not knocking anyone who has one. However, there are those of us who are making the choice to be single and that’s just as great. Even on Valentine’s Day.

Being Single on Valentine's Day

Choosing to be Single

I get asked a lot, by friends and family why I don’t have a significant other. Obviously they are coming from a good place of wanting me to be happy with someone else because they think I’m smart and pretty yada yada. It’s not like I’m totally going out of my way to not have a boyfriend, but I’m also not going out of my way TO have a boyfriend. Nearly two years ago I got out of a toxic friendship, and it really messed me up. I’ve had fairly low self-esteem my whole life so, I’ve had this thought of not being ready to date for a long time, but how I became in this friendship solidified that for me. The need for this friend to love me became crippling, I couldn’t function without them telling me they loved me it still makes me shudder to this day.

After I started to heal the wound that friendship had left, I made a promise to myself. I would never again in my life define my worth on someone else. I would never NEED someone to love me again, too make up for the fact that I don’t love myself. I’m not saying that I need to be perfect, because clearly that’ll never happen. What I am saying though is, I’m making the choice to continue to work on myself BY myself. I know I’m not the only one who feels this way, which makes me feel more comfortable talking about it. I’ve made this choice so that when I do find someone they can become an addition to my life but not my whole life.

Single on Valentines

Self-Love Activities

During the run up to Valentine’s Day you see everyone talking about activities for couples to do on that special day. While us single folks might not have someone to spend a romantic evening with, we can spend a romantic evening with ourselves.

If you really think about it, majority of the typical romantic activities couples do on Valentine’s Day can be done solo. Candle lit dinner, bubble bath with roses, sexy time in lingerie…all can be done solo. While physical self-love is totally normal and healthy for that matter, it’s not something I usually talk about here on my blog. So, here are some other self-love activities you can do if you’re Valentine’s date goes by the name “Me, Myself and I.”

  • Read a romance novel
  • Watch a Rom-Com
  • Paint your nails
  • Cuddle with your fur baby
  • Do a hair and face mask
  • Cook your favorite meal

Self Love Activities

My Valentine’s Day

My Valentine’s Day looks pretty much like the one that I have outlined above. I’m going to have a nice bowl of mac and cheese while I watch the latest episode of Grey’s Anatomy. What I want you all to remember is that in a relationship or not, when it comes down to it February 14th is just another day on the calendar. Don’t let all the loved up couples bring you down, but at the same time don’t bring them down because they do have someone.

If you don’t have someone to make you feel loved, show yourself that love. You want flowers? Buy them for yourself. You want a fancy Italian dinner? Order Olive Garden to go. You want someone to give you a massage? Book yourself a trip to the spa. I fully believe that we are all where we’re meant to be in this moment, and that people come into our lives when we need them too. When we stop putting so much pressure on finding someone else to complete us, and focus on completing ourselves that’s when we come alive.

Being Single On Valentine's Day

What do your Valentine’s Day plans look like? Loved up or not, let me know in the comments. I’d love to hear from you. Thanks for stopping by..until next time..

Be Nice. Be Good.

Mich. x

Simply Michelle

Hi! I’m Mich. I’m a 26 year old young woman trying to navigate adulthood and all the challenges it brings. On Simply Michelle you will find genuine posts about a wide range of topics from mental health & faith to makeup & baking. This is my safe place to be vulnerable and hopefully you'll feel that you can do the same. I hope you stick around!

Be Nice. Be Good. x

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  1. This is such a gorgeous post my darling! I think as long as you’re happy, if you ever choose to be with someone your time will come but at the end of the day your happiness truely comes first and your outlook on it is absolutely correct!

    Love, Amie ❤
    The Curvaceous Vegan

    1. couldn’t agree more, I’d love to grow old with someone who gets me. Life isn’t meant to spend alone but also my well being and independence isn’t worth losing over someone else x

  2. I love this post! I’m in a relationship but I seriously get tired of all the date night style posts after a while – self love is just as important and should be normal on V Day!

    Rhianna x

    1. I love that outlook! at the end of the day self love is the most important kind of love x

  3. I can totally relate to everything you said. I’m single and I don’t really have a problem with that. I know that I would have a boyfriend if it was the right time to have one. Until that times come I’m just going to be reading all the romantic books I can put my hands on. Hope you had a lovely day! 😉 x

    Antonia || Sweet Passions

    1. Yesssss! I love me a good romance novel lol! let me know if you find anything worth checking out xx

  4. Very single and I forgot that today was Valentines day until I saw someone on twitter complaining about people complaining about Valentines and that was lunchtime. I didn’t give it much thought. I spent my night at the gym, now I’m home watching Bones with my fur baby. Just a normal day 😂. As long as you’re happy doing whatever you’re doing, that’s all that matters x


    1. literally me, i went to work. had mac and cheese like i said i was gonna and did 4 loads of laundry lol! x

  5. This is so true Michelle, i echo everything you said here. Don’t get me wrong I’d like to meet someone new however I know the dangers of being with the wrong person. because of that past, I’d rather be single in the present till I know I’ve found someone I feel i can trust to be my future. enjoy your treats <3
    Helen /

    1. yup! you hit the nail on the head! I think we were meant to share this life with someone so I’m not against relationships at all, but i’m not gonna risk my well being again

  6. This was such a great post! Leaving toxic friendships/relationships are so difficult. But such a huge lesson. I typically don’t celebrate Valentines Day, even if I’m in a relationship. However, I always make sure to put in some time throughout my weeks for self care 🙂 But I get it- for me I agree completely, I would like to find someone but the situations I’ve been in before with the toxic partners just make me cautious and really just focusing on myself and if someone comes along then that’s just an added bonus <3

    Amanda- Activated Living

    1. that’s how i feel! I want to focus on giving myself the love I need. if someone comes along and can add to that love then that’s great because I have a lot of love to share, but not at the expense of myself.

  7. Preach girl!!

    1. thanks for the love ❤️❤️

  8. This is a lovely post! I really don’t see the point in Valentine’s Day! I do have a partner but why spend one day a year loving one another. As long as you’re happy, that’s the main thing right? Valentine’s can just be a good self care evening.

    Gemma |

    1. oh absolutely! i understand the extra effort but it shouldn’t be the only day you show love

  9. shopwithleslie says:

    There is nothing like a little R & R solo time to replenish the soul. Great post and perspective.

    1. couldn’t agree more! so glad you enjoyed ❤️

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