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How to Maintain Friendships in Your 20s

Hey guys! Hope you’re all doing well! If you’re anything like me, friendships have been pretty easy for you growing up. I’ve had the same group of friends for all my life. However, as I’ve grown older I’ve found that it takes a lot more work to maintain those friendships. Your 20s are the years that you’re away at school, then you’re trying to figure out what it is you want from life and start making steps to make that happen. Add in the fact that you’re probably making shit money while having to pay bills, it can be really hard to keep up with friends. So how do I do it? Having friends in your 20s is such an important part of your life but how do you keep them when you’ve got a million and one things going on?

Texting/Calling

Modern technology is such a helpful tool when trying to maintain friendships in your 20s. If you’re currently in your twenties, that means some of you were growing up before/during the era of cell phones. Call me old school, but talking to your friends in the phone is a great way to keep the friendship going. Setting aside a time that allows you guys to catch up and chat about what’s going on in life. Whether that’s just in your 30 minute drive home from work or while you walk around the grocery store. You could even FaceTime a friend while you guys watch the latest episode of Grey’s Anatomy together. Simply making that person a priority in your busy life is gonna help you from drifting.

Texting is also a great way to stay in contact with friends in your 20s. If you aren’t much of a one on one texter, you could create a group chat with all your friends. This way you have a big community where you can chat about your work day or just send funny meme’s to each other. It will help you feel like you’re sitting around at lunch just having a laugh with your friends.

Meet Up for Food

To go off the last sentence, going out to eat with your friends is a great way to help maintain the friendship. Sometimes people are so busy that they don’t have the option of spending the entire day with their friends. (I do though think if you can, you should set aside one day a month to spend the whole day together.) However, setting aside at least an hour of your day where you can sit and spend quality time together will go a lot farther then it may sound.

I work by myself, and while I do enjoy it a lot I have minimal human interaction all day. That is where meeting up for coffee becomes helpful. There are some things you don’t want to talk about over the phone. Meeting up for this one on one time allows you both to get things off your chest that you’ve been struggling with. Sometimes, all you need is to be hugged by one of your friends.

Be Understanding of Schedules

This is the biggest thing that will help you maintain friendships in your 20s. Your schedules are going to clash and that’s okay. You’re not teenagers anymore, you’ve got adult responsibilities. Some of your friends may even have children and their own family. People aren’t going to be able to always drop everything for you when you want to go to the movies. You need to be understanding of that.

Being in your 20s can be really lonely, especially when you haven’t had any down time to spend with friends. You still need to understand though that there are gonna be weeks maybe months, where your schedule won’t align with your friends. What’s important is that you take advantage of when they do line up.

Friendships

You’ll Make it Work if You Want To

The most important piece of advice I can give you when trying to maintain friendships in your 20s is that, if you want to make it work you will. Friendship is a two way street that takes equal effort on both parts. That’s not to say it’s not gonna sometimes be 70/30 when someone is struggling. However, if you become the one who is struggling then your friend should be the one putting in the 70. That way it’s a balanced friendship.

When you’re in your 20s you realize, you don’t have time or energy for people that don’t have time for you. Heck, you barely have energy for people who do make time for you. That can make maintaining friendships really difficult. With these tips, I hope you find maintaining your friendships a little easier. What do you do to maintain friendships, especially if you don’t see your friends often? Let me know in the comments. Thanks for stopping by, until next time…

Be Nice. Be Good.

Mich. x

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Simply Michelle

Hi! I’m Michelle, but you can call me Mich. I’m just your normal 24 year old trying to figure out life and thought I’d share some of my experiences and interests with the world. This blog will cover all things under the sun from makeup favorites to mental health to religion and everything serious or not so serious in between! I want us to build a little community filled with love and support so please leave me comments and hit that follow button on your way out. This blog has a very special place in my heart and feels like a important part of my path in life so I hope you stay a while and check out what it’s like to be Simply Michelle.

Be Nice. Be Good.

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16 Comments

  1. It’s much harder maintaining friendships the older you get. I think being understanding of each other’s schedules is really important. It’s also important that you accept change and be flexible.

    1. completely agree! so important! xx

  2. Wow ❤

    1. ❤️❤️

  3. It’s definitely tough! What has always worked for me is making standing weekly appointments with friends (and partners, when I was poly!). Certain days/meals dedicated to hanging out with one person regularly. I know that I’m super lucky to be able to do this, but like you said, if you prioritize it, you’ll make it work!

    1. yup! you can make anything work if you want it too, it might not be ideal but you can still make it work. xx

  4. I have met a lot of friends online through writing and have not even met them in person though I know we have a good relationship. The key is staying in touch and sharing all the little details that compromise your life.

    Friendship is not sitting across from each other over dinner and using your phones!

    1. completely agree! it’s nice that you can sometimes be comfortable enough in silence with someone but that shouldn’t be your entire relationship

  5. It’s so tough maintaining friendships as you get older and life gets a little busier. I think this is a great reminder of how we can make time for friends and ways we can continue to work on that friendship.

    1. thank you! i’m so glad you enjoyed xx

  6. These are great tips and things to think about when trying to maintain friendships! I have definitely learned what positive friendships are and what I deserve xx

    1. it sucks going through bad friendships and being treated in a way you shouldn’t but always leads to better things xx

      1. Definitely xx

  7. Amita Kundlani says:

    The older you get the harder it gets to maintain friendships. These are great tips! I think as long as you both put in the effort the friendship will last x

    amerzwithlove.com

    1. effort is so important, i couldn’t agree more. xx

  8. […] my last post about maintaining friendships in your 20s, I mentioned that your 20s can be a really lonely time. Podcasts make me feel less alone because […]

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